The Power of Flour (T-Plus 292 Days)

No matter what questions or mysteries are going on in life, one thing remains the same – the correct combination of butter, sugar, flour and 350 degrees yields wonderful results. You can add chocolate, pumpkin, banana, carrot … whatever; it will likely turn out pretty amazing.

I think this is what I love most about baking – the formulaic certainty combined with the endless possibilities for creativity. It is no wonder this is the activity I turn to most often to relieve stress, quell sadness, exude happiness and express lo_ _ … err, appreciation.

I have come up with some pretty incredible recipe combinations in the last several months, covering a gamut of emotions and each forever tied with a given moment. NDNS’ birthday cupcakes, road trip cookies, Sparks’ care package or just a lonely wine-filled Sunday afternoon.

The months since turning 30, and even more so since I last produced something blog-worthy, have gone by in a blur that have somehow been both action-packed and yet uneventful. In short, they have left a lot of room for baking.

Some 173 days ago, I thought my whole life was coming together. I was in the process of getting to know a truly extraordinary man and was interviewing for a job that was everything I had been looking for, including close to him. As it turns out, neither was meant to be.

The two things were so joined in my mind that, when I didn’t get the job, I realized many of my feelings for the man just weren’t there, despite how much I wanted them to be. He was, and still is, wonderful, but at the risk of being a total cornball, there just weren’t … sparks.

And we all know how important I think those are.

In the months since, there have been some incredibly low, lonely moments, but also some not-so-lonely ones, completely blissful ones as well. I find myself in the kitchen more and more, biding my time between the two extremes and continually searching for my happy medium.

As for tonight’s baked goods? I have banana cupcakes cooling right now and just waiting to be piped with cinnamon honey buttercream. The purpose of them is twofold – to use the rotten bananas stinking up the fruit bowl and to create something which makes sense. Because sometimes that is all you can do.