A blog post on the The Daily Love came across my twitter feed this morning, retweeted by one of my friends, titled “Training for Your First Love-A-Thon.” The idea, at first, intrigued me. It follows the basis of getting ready for a marathon -- how you would never go into one without proper training and the same thing should hold true for love.
The authors, Janis Gaudelli and Tristan Coopersmith, break into six steps:
- Do your research on all that is involved
- Understand the right head and heart space needed to be successful
- Gear up (proper support and equipment)
- Start the training process (charting your course, pacing, etc.)
- Ready, set, go (put into action all that you learned, keeping your eye on the goal)
- Crossing the finish line (you made it…be happy and proud)
As I am currently in training for my second century ride, I found the comparison to working out appealing. I realize, of course, it is meant to be taken tongue-in-cheek, but on some level I wanted to be able to identify with the step-by-step approach and analogy.
I quickly realized, however, I want to take the exact opposite approach to love. As Sam in the movie Love Actually said, let’s get the shit kicked out of us by love.
I was catching up with my neighbor the other day while I was on my way out the door to work. As a late-30s married woman with a young child, she occasionally longs for her 20-something single days and likes to live vicariously through hearing of my escapades, although it should be noted after observing his comings and goings, she is still convinced Mr. NDNS and I will get together. Regardless, we hadn’t chatted since Match-Point gave way to Sparks and there was a lot to catch her up on.
I told her of Sparks’ and my upcoming visit and how I was excited, but thought we both knew it wasn’t going to work beyond this trip, or maybe a couple more. She was appalled I would go into it with such an attitude and asked him if he was someone I could see myself being with. I replied with “yes, but …” and started to list distance, job commitments and other reasons why it wouldn’t work and she interrupted me.
“No buts. If he makes you smile, you have to take a chance on love.”
It could probably be argued the last 29 years of my life have been all the training for the love-a-thon I really need, but if we’re looking at it as an isolated case, I am skipping all of the other steps and steeling myself for “ready, set, go” when I see him in just about two weeks. Not in a jump-straight-into-bed or profess-my-undying-love way, but in a manner where my heart is open and prepared for whatever is ready to enter it.
And where I am ready to do whatever it takes to finish the race, cross the finish line and relish in victory … or be proud in defeat.
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